Have you ever caught yourself saying: "I have to prepare for this presentation," or "I should attend this networking event," or "I must respond to these client emails"?

The language we choose—both in our professional communication and our internal dialogue—has a profound impact on how we feel, how we perform, and ultimately, how our message lands with others.

From Obligation to Opportunity

Using words like have to, should, or must creates an internal response of resistance. These phrases subtly tell your brain that you're being forced to do something against your will. Even as successful professionals, we can unwittingly trigger the same rebellious response we had as children when told to clean our rooms.

Instead, try replacing these obligation words with get to, choose to, or want to.

"I get to prepare for this presentation" implies an opportunity rather than a burden. "I choose to attend this networking event" acknowledges your agency in building valuable connections. "I want to respond to these client emails" reframes a task as a purposeful action aligned with your goals.

Communicating with Impact Starts Internally

At Business Speaking Solutions, we've observed that the most impactful communicators are mindful of their words—not just in front of an audience, but in how they speak to themselves about their professional responsibilities.

Consider the difference between these statements:

• "I have to lead the weekly team meeting" vs. "I get to guide my team through our priorities"

• "I should speak up more in discussions" vs. "I choose to contribute my valuable perspective"

• "I must network at this industry event" vs. "I want to connect with colleagues who might benefit from my expertise"

The second version in each pair doesn't just feel better—it actually primes your brain for engagement, creativity, and authentic connection.

Beyond Self-Talk: How Your Word Choice Affects Your Audience

This principle extends beyond your internal dialogue. The language you use when communicating with clients, colleagues, and teams shapes how they receive your message.

In today's hybrid work environment, many professionals struggle with digital communication fatigue. Notice how different these meeting invitations feel:

"You need to join the quarterly review meeting" versus "You're invited to contribute to our quarterly planning session."

The first creates resistance; the second invites engagement. One feels like an obligation; the other feels like participation in something valuable.

Matching Your Voice to Your Expertise

When you're an expert in your field, your language should reflect the confidence and command you've worked hard to develop. Phrases like "I think maybe we could try..." undermine your authority before you've even shared your insight.

Instead, try "Based on my experience, I recommend..." or "I've found that this approach delivers results."

These small shifts in language don't just change how others perceive you—they transform how you see yourself. Your brain believes everything you tell it. When you speak with confidence, you begin to feel more confident.

Practical Application: The 24-Hour Language Challenge

For the next 24 hours, become acutely aware of your language choices. Each time you catch yourself using words like "have to," "should," or "must," pause and rephrase with "get to," "choose to," or "want to."

Pay attention to:

• Your internal dialogue about work responsibilities

• How you frame requests to your team

• The way you describe upcoming presentations or meetings

• Your email language when scheduling appointments or following up

At the end of the day, reflect on how this simple shift affected your energy, enthusiasm, and the responses you received from others.

Your Voice Matters in Every Business Interaction

Public speaking isn't just for stages and formal presentations. It happens in every email, virtual meeting, client call, and hallway conversation. The words you choose shape your professional identity and determine whether your expertise gets the recognition it deserves.

Stop overthinking and start communicating with impact by being intentional about your language. Your voice deserves to be heard—and the right words will ensure that it is.

Ready to refine your message and strengthen your communication confidence? Book your Blueprint for Speaking Excellence call today and discover how matching your voice to your expertise can transform your professional presence.