From Frazzled to Focused: 3 Traps That Sabotage Your Presence
Have you ever walked into a presentation, team meeting, or networking event already feeling behind?
Maybe you were rushing from another commitment…
Mentally reviewing everything you wanted to say…
And at the same time, telling yourself you’re probably going to mess it up anyway.
That moment right there—before you even speak—is when confidence is either strengthened or sabotaged.
And for most people, it's sabotage.
If you’re tired of starting your speaking moments feeling flustered or off-balance, you’re not alone. But you don’t have to stay stuck in that cycle.
Let’s talk about the 3 most common traps that steal your presence—and how to flip them.
Trap #1: The “What If It All Goes Wrong” Spiral
This is one of the most common pre-speaking patterns: Your mind starts racing through every possible disaster scenario.
What if I forget what I wanted to say?
What if I stumble over my words?
What if someone challenges me and I freeze?
Before you've even opened your mouth, your nervous system is on high alert.
The Fix: Flip the spiral.
Instead of asking “what if it all goes wrong?” ask: “What if it goes right?”
What if I connect with someone new?
What if I my message lands perfectly with the audience?
What if I left go of worry and focus on enjoying myself?
This mental reset can silence your inner critic and prime your brain for connection—not fear.
Trap #2: Rushing Into the Room
Too often, we arrive at a speaking opportunity breathless—physically or mentally.
Maybe you just wrapped another meeting. Maybe you got stuck in traffic. Maybe you’re still thinking about that email that didn’t land well.
Either way, your body and brain haven’t caught up to where you are. That disconnect shows up as:
Jittery hands
A scattered introduction
An opening that feels flat
The Fix: Build a “reset” ritual.
Just 60 seconds of intentional breathwork or a grounding movement (like standing tall, rolling your shoulders back, or shaking out your arms) can help you reset your energy.
Even a long slow breath in through the nose and out through the mouth can bring you back to the moment.
Trap #3: Negative Pre-Game Pep Talks
Let’s be honest: most of us are not encouraging in the way we speak to ourselves before presenting.
We say things like:
“I’m terrible at this.”
“Just get it over with.”
“Don’t mess this up.”
Your brain is listening. And it believes you.
The Fix: Prime your mindset with intention.
Replace the negative internal script with a short, powerful phrase like:
“I’ve done this before. I can do it again.”
“I am prepared. I am present. I’ve got this.”
“They want me to succeed.”
Choose one phrase and say it (silently or aloud) before you speak. It’s simple, but it works.
Bonus: These 3 Tools Work Together
What you think, how you breathe, and what your body is doing all affect how you show up.
Together, these three tools—mindset, breathwork, and body awareness—form the foundation of the Prime Your Presence method I teach.
When you combine them into a simple pre-speaking ritual, you stop scrambling to sound “polished”…
And start showing up powerful.
Want to Go Deeper?
If you’re ready to feel more focused, calm, and confident in the moments that matter most, I’d love to invite you to my free webinar:
🗓️ Prime Your Presence: How to Show Up with Confidence. Clarity and Calm
📅 Monday, July 15 at 12:00 PM Eastern 9:00 AM Pacific
In just 45 minutes, I’ll show you the exact process I teach my clients to calm nerves and elevate their leadership presence.
